This was written in reply to a prompt from spankedbyspike on livejournal:
“It's the episode Marcus Pierce is married to Luci in the 'special cul de sac' from the ultimate suburbia and after the first "over the edge" introductions made by Luci to the neighbors, Pierce is fed up with Luci and decides to show how he'd settle some scores in a real relationship, spanking his husband on the bare...”
Summary: Lucifer does his best to overdo the bad neighbour act and Pierce is finally fed up with it.
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of these characters, and I’m not making any money from this story.
Warnings: non-consensual spanking of an adult. I do not advocate this behaviour in real life, only in fiction.
Dinner with the neighbours was a complete disaster. In the strong opinion of at least one participant. They could have made a lot of progress with their investigation by talking to Brian and Anya, if Lucifer hadn’t been so preoccupied with murdering him. Of course, each and every attempt to get him back on the right track backfired spectacularly. The man was nothing but thorough if he put his mind to it. Too bad his priorities were in the completely wrong order.
Pierce’s blood pressure was close to boiling while Lucifer was oblivious to his totally out of place behaviour. But there was only so much Pierce could do about it until the neighbours left.
He really wanted them to leave.
Lucifer on the other hand revelled in their company, inquiring about their lives and turning every bit of information into possible murder scenarios.
After an eternity – prolonged by Lucifer relentless nagging about asphyxiation caused by allergies and other ideas for undoubtedly painful ways to die – they were finally able to shut the door behind their annoyingly chipper neighbours. His temper boiling and quite fed up with Lucifer’s behaviour throughout the evening, he let instinct dictate his actions and grabbed him by the arm, pulled him close, and swatted him harshly across the butt.
They were probably equally surprised about it.
“Mmh. Didn’t take you for a man with kinky taste,” Lucifer, who had naturally recovered first, said with a leer. “I like it.”
“You need to get your priorities straight!” Pierce whispered harshly, in case their surveillance team was close enough to overhear. “We are here to solve a murder!”
“Yes,” Lucifer agreed. “The mystery of how to kill Cain.”
“No!” he hissed. “You need to take this seriously, Lucifer!”
“I am.” He managed to put an incredible amount of mocking into two simple words, and Pierce’s temper flared again. He was going to die of high blood pressure if the case wasn’t solved quickly and he had to live in close quarters with Lucifer for much longer.
“Not the part about finding a way to end my life! The investigation!”
“Pff. I can multi-task,” Lucifer replied with a derogatory hand wave. “Don’t worry. I’ll play the perfect little submissive to your dominant while we’re here. – It actually figures that you’d have to hold the reins in a relationship. Bossy much?” He let his eyes roam over Pierce’s form, making him feel naked. “Any naughty fantasies you’d like to share with your husband?”
Pierce just shook his head and turned, heading to the kitchen to finish the dishes. There was just no talking to the man. He listened half-heartedly as Lucifer talked to Chloe over the radio.
Later that night, as they were lying in bed (Lucifer insisted that in order to keep up the ruse they just had to share a bed), they actually managed to discuss a sensible plan.
“You know, I think we should work to be the most annoying neighbours to draw out this neighbourhood watchdog,” Lucifer suggested, sprawled on his back and gazing at the ceiling.
Pierce gave the idea some thought, before replying, “You’re probably right. If what Brian and Anya said is true, it would be the easiest way to get his or her attention.”
It was actually a great idea and Lucifer was completely taken up in his new task to be the worst neighbour in the history of this cul-de-sac. It was disconcerting how well he managed to slip into his new persona. Pierce endured it with his usual stoic expression, managing a false smile once in a while, as he watched his “husband” frolic around with several scantily-dressed women and cut off the roses, all while wearing star-spangled swimming trunks that left absolutely nothing to the imagination.
Lucifer did such an awesome job in just one day that they were sure they’d get a message that night.
“That was actually pretty good,” Pierce told him in the evening in an attempt to have a conversation that did not involve frayed tempers and angry words. “I don’t doubt you’ve annoyed him enough to warrant a message.”
“Of course I did.” Pierce rolled his eyes at that and quickly left the room before they started to fight again.
Lucifer was currently in the process of cutting a trumpet into several pieces; yet another attempt to lure out the Neighbourhood Watchdog. His previous ideas had sadly only soured Pierce’s mood further, instead of drawing out their desired target. A real shame because Pierce in a worse mood than his normally pretty bad one was a drag. And that was putting it mildly.
“Lucifer! What – are you building something?” Speak of the – well, not the devil – but … him. He turned around, switching off the tool momentarily.
“Yes,” he replied, as if it wasn’t totally obvious what he was doing. The same he’d been doing all day. “Our reputation as the most annoying neighbours on the block.” He turned back to the task at hand, chuckling softly at Pierce’s exasperation. The man was awfully easy to rile up, but his amusement was cut short as the tool in his hands suddenly switched off. Turning around he saw that Pierce had pulled the plug, holding a cord in each hand.
“It’s 4 a.m. Maybe we can finish this in the morning.” He deliberately did not make it sound like a suggestion, but of course Lucifer had to argue.
“We? – You’re barely involved. Do you know, I thought this was supposed to be about you and I spending time together.” He smacked the protective gloves down on the workbench angrily.
“No. No, no,” Pierce interrupted just as angrily. “This is about catching a killer.”
“You just need to open up to me.”
“That won’t solve anything!” Pierce shouted. “You’re overdoing this!”
“I feel like I don’t know you!”
“What are you talking about? – Why can’t you take the case seriously?” He made a grab for Lucifer’s arm, intending to take the discussion inside – and maybe smack some more sense into him – it had got him to shut up for a few brief, but sacred moments – when they heard Chloe shouting, and quickly ran outside, coming face to face with Brian.
“Oh hello. Have you come for your casserole dish?” Lucifer asked, as he once again was the first to find his voice.
“Hands up!” the Detective ordered and thankfully Brian complied immediately. Chloe quickly cuffed him, and read him his rights, efficient as ever.
“Decker. Wait in the car for us,” Pierce ordered, still thoroughly fed up with Lucifer’s behaviour. He wanted a few moments to ream him out in the privacy of their “home”, and hopefully get him on the straight and narrow again for the upcoming interview at the station. “We’re following you to the station in a few minutes.” The suspicious look on Chloe’s face was quickly thwarted by his terse “it’s an order”. She nodded once, then took Brian to her car.
“See, I knew you just have to control everything,” Lucifer said, waggling his eyebrows suggestively in his direction.
“Let’s talk inside,” he ordered and grabbed Lucifer’s arm to steer him through the garage and into the house. For once Lucifer went docilely, if not without sarcastic comments.
“You’re putting on some serious dom vibes, Marky Mark,” Lucifer said and Pierce just gritted his teeth and pushed him into the bedroom.
“Get dressed. We need to go to the station and listen in on Brian’s interrogation.” Instead of doing what he was told, Lucifer flung himself face down on the bed, before rolling onto his side and watching Pierce undress.
“I’m sure that won’t be necessary,” he said. “I trust that the Detective will manage perfectly without us.”
“We should focus on our other investigation.”
“No, we should not,” Pierce growled, whipping around to glare at Lucifer. “And you would be well advised to keep your mouth shut and don’t push me right now.”
Lucifer just raised an eyebrow, silently goading him into more drastic actions. He valiantly turned his back to him, trying to cool his temper that had been boiling ever since being woken at 4 a.m. by insufferable screeching.
“You really need to find an outlet for all that pent-up dominant energy,” Lucifer taunted, stretching languidly on the sheets. Before making a conscious decision to do so, Pierce was kneeling on the bed, one hand on Lucifer’s back, pressing him face down onto the mattress, while the other descended in two powerful wallops on his butt. Of course, it did not bring the desired results.
At least not yet, Pierce planned to change that.
“Mmh. I always enjoy a bit of spanking as foreplay,” Lucifer said, arching his back into the touch. “Why don’t you pull off my pyjama bottoms and make me really feel it?” Not rising to his taunt, Pierce grabbed the waistband of Lucifer’s pants and with a harsh tug had them bunch around his thighs, before continuing his onslaught.
“You need to get your act together,” he lectured, smacking his palm down repeatedly on one cheek, before switching to the other. “I told you last night to stop the bad neighbour act.” A few more heavy smacks rained down on the pale cheeks. “Overdoing it might draw out more people than the actual killer!” Pierce really put his shoulder into the slaps and Lucifer’s backside was starting to redden in some areas, and his squirming no longer had anything to do with a desire for sex.
“Pierce!” he spluttered. “What are you doing?”
“Isn't it obvious? – I’m making sure that you finally focus on the investigation and start taking things seriously!” He rained down a few more smacks, increasing the pressure on Lucifer’s back to keep him firmly in place. “And finding an outlet for all that pent-up dominant energy!”
“Ow!” Lucifer complained, scrambling to get away, but he either didn’t really want to or was too flabbergasted to really try, because he didn’t gain an inch. “Okay!”
“Okay what?” Pierce didn’t stop or slow down. He wanted this lesson to stick. And he had no desire to let Lucifer off that easily. “You have done nothing but annoy me ever since we got here.”
“You told me to annoy them!”
“Yes,” he agreed, increasing the force behind the next couple of smacks which drew some loud whining and hissing from Lucifer. “But I also told you to stop not even six hours ago, didn’t I?”
“You did!” Lucifer yelped, legs twitching with each smack. “Okay! – I agree! – I might have – ow! – overdone it! – Ah! I’m sorry, okay? – Would you stop already?” He let one last heavy smack fall, before patting Lucifer’s heaving back twice.
“Get up. Get dressed,” he ordered. “We’re going to the station.”
Lucifer slumped, one hand reaching back to pull his pyjama bottoms back in place, before he rolled himself off the bed, staring burning daggers of hate at Pierce. He remained silent, though, stripping out of his clothes with angry jerks and redressing.
“Why did you do that?” he finally asked, just before they left the house.
“You didn’t listen,” Pierce replied. “It got you to listen, didn’t it? – Get in the car. If I lose Decker in traffic, you won’t get to feel the effect of your defiance all night long.” He turned to look at Lucifer. “And I really want you to feel it.”
Grumbling under his breath about bossy dominants and their inability to understand a bit of fun, Lucifer got in the passenger seat, squirming to get comfortable and vowing to endure this torture in silence.