Author's Note: The first half of this page is a recap of the episode 'Bewitched, Bothered, & Bewildered' from Season 2 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and the second half of this page is my fiction. During this time Angel has become Angelus, and he is hanging out with Spike and Drucilla, Xander and Cordelia are dating, Willow and Oz are dating, and Giles kind of likes another teacher named Jenny. Buffy has no one, as she is still upset over Angel's change. Written - September 7, 2003
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, and I am not making any money from these stories.
Warning: Non consensual disciplinary spanking of a teen by an authority figure.



Recap of the Episode – Bewitched, Bothered, & Bewildered


Cordelia notices that her friends are starting to shun her in school. They are teasing her in a mean way for liking, and going out with Xander. Xander buy's Cordelia a necklace with a silver heart for Valentines Day, and plans to give it to her that night at the Bronze.
Xander gives her this little speech about maybe all they have together is raging hormones, but that maybe it's something more, and that he likes to think that it's more. He hands her the necklace.
Cordelia says, "Thank you. It's beautiful. I want to break up."
Xander says, "Okay, not quite the reaction I was looking for."
"Sorry, but who are we kidding. Even if we see special stuff in each other, we don't fit."
"Yeah, Okay. Do you know what a good day to break up with somebody is? Any day besides Valentines Day! I mean what? Were you running low on dramatic irony?"
"I know, I didn't mean to do it this way."
Xander says, "Well you did." Then he walks away.

The next day at school everyone is laughing at Xander, including Cordelia's friends who make fun of Xander while she is sitting there, and she does nothing. Soon Xander sees his classmate Amy. He knows Amy is a witch, and he knows that no one else knows she is a witch. He grabs her and pulls her aside. He blackmails her into doing a love spell for him. He want's her to make Cordelia fall madly in love with him, so he can break up with her, and make her feel the way he feels. Amy says she will need something of Cordelia's to do the spell.

Xander confronts Cordelia in the hallway and tells her he want's the necklace back.
Cordelia says, "I thought it was a gift."
Xander says, "No, last night it was a gift. Today it's scrap metal."
"It's in my locker."
"I can wait."
Cordelia goes to her locker and leans in to hide the fact that she had been wearing the necklace under her clothes. She hands it to Xander and says, "Here. Good thing we broke up. Now I don't have to pretend I like it."

That night Amy and Xander do the love spell.

The next day, Xander goes up to Cordelia and her circle of friends. He seems very confident and looks at Cordelia expectantly.
She says in an irritated voice, "What?"
Xander says, "Morning ladies. Some kind of weather we're having." He leans towards Cordelia.
Cordelia says, "What do you want? You can't be sniffing around for more jewelry to melt. The only thing you ever gave me was that 'Smallmart' looking thing."
Xander gives a nervous laugh and says to Cordelia, "Is this love, cause maybe on you it doesn't look that different."
"What are you doing? Are you going like stalker boy on me now?"
Xander looks confused and embarrassed. He says, "Sorry, my mistake."
Cordelia says, "Yeah, I should say so." As he walks off she asks her friends "What is his deal?"

Xander goes to the library to find Giles and Buffy. They are talking about trying to take down Angelus. As Giles walks off to find a book, Xander tells Buffy they should use him as bait for Angelus.
Buffy says she heard about Cordelia breaking up with him, and that it's her loss. She says, "Why don't we do something together tonight? Just the to of us."
"Really?"
"Yeah, we can comfort each other."
Xander smiles and says, "Would lap dancing enter into that scenario at all? Cause I'd find that very comforting."
Buffy says seductively, "If you play your cards right."
Xander looks very surprised and says, "Okay. You do know that I'm Xander right?"
Buffy goes on to explain how she doesn't know why, but she is seeing him in a new light today.
Xander is really getting into it, and being happy when Amy comes in to talk to him. She drags him off to the hall to talk in private. She says, "I don't think the spell worked out right."
Xander is distracted with looking at Buffy through the library window and says, "Yeah it bombed. No biggie."
"We could try again."
"No. It was wrong to meddle with the forces of darkness. I see that now. I gotta go."
Amy then says maybe they can just hang out together sometime, and tells Xander that she is seeing him in a new way today, and wants to spend time with him.
Xander is now realizing what has happened when another girl comes up to Xander and asks him to study with her that night. Xander looks kind of panicked, and says, "I really gotta go. Right now."
He goes home, only to find Willow in his bed with only a long shirt on.
He jumps in surprise.
Willow says, "Sorry. I wanted to surprise you."
"Good job. High marks."
"Don't be so jumpy, I've been in your bed before."
"Yeah, but Will, we were both in footie pajamas!"
"Xan, I've been thinking…"
"Will, I think I know what you're thinking, but this is all my fault. I cast a spell and it sorta backfired."
"How long have we been friends?"
"A long time. Too long to do anything that might change that now."
Willow goes on to say she wants Xander to be her first, and she nibbles on his ear. He says it's time for him to be a man, and runs off.

The next day in school Cordelia finds that her friends are shunning her once again. She wants to know what's up, and finds out that they are now mad at her for hurting Xander, and breaking up with him.

We see Xander walking down the hall, and ALL the girls are watching him. He makes it to the library where Giles is.
Giles says, "What is it?"
"It's me throwing myself at your mercy."
"What? Why?"
Xander looks embarrassed, and says, "I made a mess Giles. Ya see, I found out Amy's into witchcraft, and I was hurt I guess, and I made her put the love whammy on Cordy, but it backfired, and now every woman in Sunnydale wants to make me her cuddle monkey. Which may sound swell on paper, but…"
Jenny comes in to talk to Giles but then notices Xander and can't stop looking at him.
Giles sees Jenny's reaction to Xander, and she is soon rubbing Xander's arm. Giles pulls Jenny slightly away from Xander and says in a serious and disapproving voice, "I can not believe that you are fool enough to do something like this."
Xander says, "Oh no, I'm twice the fool it takes to do something like this."
Giles says, "Has Amy tried to reverse the spell?"
"I get around Amy, and all she wants to do is talk honeymoon plans."
Jenny says, "Maybe I should talk to Xander alone."
Giles gets close to Xander's face and says in a stern voice, "Do you have any idea how serious this is? People under a love spell, Xander, are deadly. They loose all capacity for reason, and if what you say is true, and the entire female population is effected…"
Giles pauses, and Xander looks scared with wide eyes. Giles says in a louder voice, "Don't leave the library." Xander jumps and gulps. Giles continues, "I'm going to find Amy, and see if we can put a stop to this thing." He takes Jenny with him.

Xander feels relived that he is alone, and then Buffy comes in wearing just a rain coat and high heels. Buffy comes on to him and he refuses her. She gets angry and then Amy comes in. Buffy and Amy fight. Amy turns Buffy into a rat.
Giles runs in with Jenny and says, "What just happened?"
Jenny and Amy start fighting too.

It cuts to Cordy getting beat up by other girls for hurting Xander.

It cuts back to the library where Giles says to Jenny and Amy, "You two sit. Be quiet. We have to catch the Buffy rat."
Xander and Giles get on the floor and look for the rat.
Xander looks up to see Oz standing over him. Oz punches Xander in the face. Oz shakes his hand and says, "That kinda hurt."
Xander says, "Kinda?! What was that for?"
Oz says, "I was on the phone all night listening to Willow cry about you. Now, I don't know exactly what happened, but I was left with a very strong urge to… hit you."
Oz gives Xander a hand and helps him up.
Xander says, "I didn't touch her. I swear."
Giles in an angry voice, "Xander where's Buffy?!"
All three guys get down to look for Buffy rat, but with no luck.
Giles looks at Xander. He says, "I don't see her. If anything happens to her I'll…" Giles sounds exasperated, and continues with, "Oh just go home. Lock yourself away. You're only going to cause more problems here. Jenny, Amy, and I will try to break the spell. Oz, if you could aid us in trying to find Buffy.."
Oz says, "Sure."
Xander looks to Giles and says, "If…"
Giles says coldly, "Just go. Get out of my site."
Xander bows his head, and slowly walks out of the library. He sees some girls beating up Cordelia and runs to grab her. He picks her up and carries her away from the other girls.

We see Giles talking to Jenny and Amy. He is trying to convince them to help him. He says, "Xander has put himself in very grave danger, and you need to help save him."

We see Xander and Cordelia running out of the school only to find a mob of women headed up by Willow holding an ax. They all want to hurt Xander because they can't have him. Xander and Cordelia run.

It is now getting dark, and Xander and Cordelia are slowing down. Xander says, "We lost them."
Cordelia says, "Damn it! Tell me what's going on. Who died and made you Elvis?"
Xander notices where they are and says, "Buffy's house. Let's get inside. I'll explain later."
They go in and Buffy's mom Joyce starts to come onto Xander. Cordelia and Xander end up locking themselves in the basement. Cordelia says, "Why has everyone gone insane?"
Xander says, "Insane? Is it impossible for you to believe that other women find me attractive?"
"The only way you could get girls to want you, is to use witchcraft."
"That is such a… well, yeah. Okay, good point."

Cuts to Giles and Amy starting the reversing spell both for the Buffy rat, and the love spell.

The mob has found Xander and Cordelia who are trying to nail the door to the basement closed. Cordelia says, "If we die in here, I'm gonna kick your ass. I mean it."
Xander says, "None of this would have happened if you hadn't broken up with me. But no, you're so desperately popular."
"Me! I'm not the one who embraced the black arts just to get the girls to like me… Well congratulations it worked!"
"It would have worked fine, except your hide is so thick, not even magic can penetrate it."
Cordelia looks shocked and says, "You mean, that spell was for me?"
Xander and Cordelia share a look, and then a knife from the mob cuts through the door. The mob breaks through the door, and Xander keeps Cordelia behind him and tries to protect them both from the angry women.

It cuts to Giles and Amy who have just finished both spells.

The mob stops trying to attack Xander and Cordelia, and the women all look kind of confused. Cordelia says, "Great scavenger hunt." And Xander gives a nervous laugh.

The next day at school, Buffy and Xander are talking about what happened. Buffy says Willow will not talk to Xander yet, and Buffy guesses it will take about a month of groveling before she will forgive him. She explains that it's harder for Willow than anyone else, because she loved Xander for a long time before this happened. Buffy says she remembers coming onto Xander, and she remembers that he didn't take her up on it. She says, "There's hope for you yet."
Xander says, "Tell that to Cordy."
"You're on your own there."

Cordelia and her friends are walking down the hall, and Xander accidentally bumps one of them. The girl says, "Watch it!"
Xander mumbles, "Sorry." And starts to walk off.
The girl says, "God, you know I'm glad your mom's off working at the drive through long enough to dress you."
Xander bows his head and walks off.
Cordelia, who has been watching this whole thing, is now really mad. She says, "Shut up. You're a sheep."
Xander looks back surprised.
Cordelia continues with, "I'm not a sheep. I can do what I want, ware what I want…"
Xander smiles
"…and date who I want. No matter how lame he is."
Xander's smile wavers, but comes back as Cordelia goes to him.
As they walk off hand in hand, Cordelia says in a scared voice, "Oh, God! They're never gonna speak to me again!"
Xander reassures her, "Sure they will. It's gonna be okay. If it helps, when we're around them, we'll fight a lot."
Cordelia smiles up at him, "Promise?"
"You can pretty much count on it."

That's the end of the episode.


My fiction – Worth It


Xander had avoided the library all day, because he didn't want to face Giles and listen to the lecture about how he had messed up. After school Cordelia had cheerleading practice, and Xander decided to go face the music. He knew he had to see Giles at some point, and he wanted to get it over with, and with as few witnesses as possible. He knew Oz and Willow had left school as soon as it was over to be alone and talk, so he headed for the library. He opened the door, and saw Buffy sitting by herself looking at a book. She looked up and said, "Hey."

"Hey. Is Giles here?"

"Would he be anywhere else?"

"Good point. What are you reading?"

Buffy looked at the book with disgust, "More accounts of things Angelus did. It's really gross. Oh, I saw you and Cordelia together at lunch. What's up with that?"

Xander sat down next to Buffy and smiled. He said, "Well the love spell backfired, but at the same time it kind of worked out anyway, because Cordy decided to take me back. I guess maybe it was worth it in a way."

Xander and Buffy both jumped at the voice behind them saying "What?!"

They turned around to see a very angry Giles. Xander gulped and stammered with a nervous laugh, "Did I say it was worth it? No that's not what I meant at all. I must still be feeling the stress from yesterday. I meant it was wrong, and very bad. Not at all worth it."

Giles glared at Xander and said, "Buffy, if you want to, you can take that book home to read it. I think Xander and I need to have a talk."

Buffy looked at Xander with pity and said, "Okay Giles. Do you want me to patrol tonight, or are we still waiting for a few days in case Angelus wants to surprise me?"

Giles looked at Buffy and said, "Let's wait for a couple more nights just in case."

"Sounds good. I can get in some studying, and do the bonding thing with Mom. See you both tomorrow."

As Buffy walked out, Giles resumed his glaring at Xander, and Xander's eyes kept darting around looking for an escape. Giles said, "Come back to my office."

Xander looked up to see Giles walking into his office. Xander got up and slowly walked into the office. Giles closed and locked the door behind them, and closed the shade. Xander thought this was a very, very bad sign, and made his stomach feel unsteady. He thought, 'Okay Xander, note to self – once you make Giles mad, wait a couple of days before going to see him. Maybe a week.'

Giles crossed his arms and stood by the door. He said in a very calm voice. "Sit down Xander."

Xander sat and looked at the floor. Giles started pacing around while talking. He said, "I am really disappointed in you Xander. Playing with magic is never safe, but playing with spells that involve serious emotions is just stupid. I still can't believe you thought it would be a good idea. You are very lucky that Amy and I were able to reverse the spell before you or Cordelia were seriously hurt."

"Thanks for reversing it by the way. You did it just in time. One more second and we…." Xander realized this was not helping his case and shut up.

Giles said, "Please go on, what would have happened if the spell took one second longer."

Xander mumbled, "The girls would have seriously hurt me and Cordy, and may have killed us."

"Exactly my point. Then just now, I overhear you telling Buffy that you think it was worth it. Tell me exactly how you think getting back together with Cordelia was worth causing all those women pain. Tell me how it was worth it, even though you very nearly got Buffy, Cordelia, and yourself killed. Tell me how it was worth it, when you hurt your best friend so badly that she won't talk to you now."

Xander was very red and close to tears at this. He said, "You're right Giles. It wasn't worth it at all. I'm happy to have Cordy back, but I wouldn't do the same thing again, even if Cordy ended up hating me forever. I love Will. She's my best bud. I would never hurt her on purpose. I…. I feel really bad about that."

Giles was quiet for a few minutes, and then he said, "We have known each other for a couple of years now Xander, and you've helped Buffy and me fight off many adversaries. Both you and Willow have been indispensable, but usually a Slayer works alone. I'm beginning to think that maybe I was wrong to let you two help. Maybe bringing in civilians was more dangerous than I thought. You would have never believed in witchcraft before you worked with us."

Xander was getting panicked and said, "No Giles. Willow and I know the risks, and we still want to help. We have a better chance at surviving just by knowing what's out there. I swear this was just my mistake. I make big mistakes all the time, and I'm sure I would have done something dumb, even if I didn't know about witchcraft. I promise it won't happen again."

Giles said, "Yesterday you did seem fairly repentant about it, and I thought you had learned your lesson. But how can I trust you not to do something similar again when I overhear you saying it was worth it?"

Xander said, "I didn't mean it Giles. My mouth just runs away by itself sometimes, and I end up saying things that I regret."

"You regret saying it, but maybe that's because it has some truth in it, and you don't want people to know. I had planned on talking with you about the dangers of using magic, but now I think we need to do something a bit more drastic, to make sure once and for all that you don't think this mess was worth it in any way."

Xander gave a nervous laugh and said, "Umm, drastic? I promise Giles, I won't do anything with magic again. You can all just call me No Magic Xander. It will be my new motto."

Giles said, "No. I'm sorry Xander, but that's just not good enough."

Xander's stomach got even worse, and he said, "What um…. What do you want me to do to make it right again?"

Giles walked towards his desk and said, "Yes, right. I am going to give you a choice Xander. Either you let me punish you…" Giles got a large wooden ruler out of his desk drawer. "Or, you leave the library and never help us with a case again."

Xander jumped up and started backing towards the door. He stared at the ruler and said, "P.. Punish me? What exactly do you mean."

"I will be spanking you."

"No friggin way! You can't do that! Buffy wouldn't let you!"

Giles narrowed his eyes, and said in a very calm and deadly voice, "If you will not accept punishment, then you will sever your ties to Buffy today. You will not come to the library at all. If you want a book, someone else can rent it for you. And it means no more going over to Buffy's house. I will be calling Joyce and explaining that I think you are a bad influence on Buffy. I wonder who Willow will chose to hang out with when given the choice."

Xander stood there and tried to make his brain come up with a solution that didn't involve getting spanked, or losing his friends. He said, "Maybe Buffy and Willow won't listen to you at all. Maybe they'll take my side after they hear what you want to do to me."

Giles shook his head and said, "I wasn't planning on telling them about this, but if you want to explain it to them, go right ahead. I wonder what they will think you deserve after all the pain you put them through yesterday."

Giles stood waiting while Xander thought about it. He tried to come up with some coherent arguments, but his thoughts were so jumbled that all that came out was a somewhat whiney, "I don't want you to."

Giles said, "Yes, I'm sure you don't. That's what will make it an effective punishment, and hopefully make you realize that playing with magic is completely unacceptable."

Xander stood there, and knew Giles was right. He thought, 'I know that right now Willow would agree with him, and probably even Buffy would too. But a spanking! That's just so… horrible. But I can't just stop seeing my friends. And I do kind of deserve… NO. I don't want to go there. Just agree and get it over with. No sense in delaying it. Jeez Xander, just be a man. It can't be that bad.' He nodded to Giles and said in a small voice, "Okay."

Giles walked over and put a hand on Xander's shoulder. He said, "You made the right choice. You'll feel better once we're done, and all will be forgiven, if not forgotten."

Xander nodded and tried to keep himself from looking like a moron by getting on his knees and begging Giles not to.

Giles said in a calm and reassuring voice, "Let's get this over with. I want you to drop your pants and bend over my desk please."

Xander said, "Um… Maybe we could… uuh.."

Giles glared and said, "Right now Alexander."

Xander's eyes widened, and he gulped. He fumbled with the button on his jeans with shaky fingers. As Xander was working on his pants, Giles put some pressure on Xander's shoulder to get him moving towards the desk. Xander started walking, and by the time he got to the desk his loose jeans had fallen to the floor. Xander stood there staring at the desk thinking that this had to be one of his awful nightmares. Surly this couldn't be real. Giles tired not to laugh at the happy face boxers, and he put a little pressure on Xander's shoulder again and said, "Bend over and grab the other edge of the desk."

Xander bent over and grabbed the other edge in a death grip. He was tall enough that he couldn't exactly lie on the desk, because his hips were higher than the edge of the desk. Giles said, "Put your chest on the desk too."

Xander did, and thought this was even more uncomfortable. His butt was way up in the air compared to the rest of his body. Giles put a firm hand in the middle of Xander's back, slightly holding him down. He said, "You will not use magic Xander. Am I understood."

"Yes… Yes sir."

With that Giles brought the ruler down hard in the center of Xander's butt. Xander let out a loud grunt. He couldn't believe how much it hurt. When his dad was drunk he would slap him around sometimes, but he hadn't been spanked since he was very young. Before he could suck in a breath, another loud swat landed right below but slightly overlapping the first. He sucked in air and found himself yelping a loud 'Oww' with the next swat. By the time Giles got to his upper thighs Xander was yelling pretty loud. When Giles started to move the ruler back up Xander's butt as he spanked, Xander said, "Please... Aahh!… No more…. Ooww… Please, Giiiiiles!"

Giles had already said all that he felt he needed to say, so he just kept on spanking. By the time he got to the very top of Xander's butt, he had to put quite a bit of pressure on Xander's back to keep him in place. When Giles started the ruler back down his butt, Xander was starting to get frantic to get away from the pain, and reached his hands back to protect his butt. Giles was barley able to stop the ruler in time to not hit Xander's fingers. He said quietly, "Remove your hands Alexander, we are not done yet."

Xander didn't, so Giles took aim, and swatted him hard on his bare thighs. Xander screamed and moved his hands back to the edge of the desk. Giles started up again where he had left off, and continued down Xander's butt. By the time Giles had reached Xander's sit spot, Xander was crying. Giles gave him five more hard swats all on the sit spot. Xander was crying hard and gasping for breath by the time Giles was done. Giles stopped putting pressure on Xander's back and rubbed his hand in a circular motion. He said quietly, "Okay, we're done here. I don't want to ever see you using magic again."

Xander nodded while he was crying. Giles put a hand on his arm to help him stand up. Once he was up, he stood still with his head bowed and tried to stop crying. Giles put the ruler on the desk and pulled Xander into a hug. Xander was surprised, but thought it felt nice, so he hugged him back. Once Xander had stopped crying Giles put his hands on Xander's shoulders and held him at arms length. Xander was looking at the floor. Giles said, "Fix your pants, and look at me."

Xander pulled up his pants, and was very glad they were loose as he buttoned them up. Then he tried to make eye contact, but couldn't. Giles put his hand on Xander's chin and raised his face to look at him. He said gently, "There's nothing to be embarrassed about now Xander. I hope you know that I feel like the three of you kids are… well, kind of like my own children. If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't have taken the time to correct you. Believe me when I tell you, that I would know how to be rid of you if I didn't care."

Xander wasn't sure if he should feel better about that or not. He nodded. Giles handed him a box of tissues and Xander wiped his eyes, and blew his nose repeatedly. When he was done Giles put an arm around his shoulders and headed them towards the door. Giles said, "I will not tell anyone about this. As far as I'm concerned it's just between you and me. But if you feel it necessary, or helpful, you can talk to your friends about it. Who knows, maybe Willow will forgive you sooner."

Xander got very embarrassed just thinking about telling anyone. He planned to take this to his grave. When they got to the door, Giles unlocked it, and pulled the shade up as he opened it to reveal a very angry looking Willow. Willow said in a disapproving voice, "Giles how could you?"

Xander just wanted to melt into the floor when he realized Willow must have heard what had happened. His whole upper half got as red as his butt.

Giles was surprised, but also a little angry that what he considered to be a private moment had been interrupted. He said, "It is none of your business Willow. You shouldn't be listening at office doors. It shows bad manners."

Willow glared at him and put her arms around Xander. She hugged him tight and said, "Xan, are you alright? Do you want me to call the cops?"

Xander hugged her back and said, "No Willow. I… I deserved it. Giles was right. I hurt you, and it was dangerous. I'm so sorry."

Willow stepped back and looked surprised. She wasn't sure what to say but what came out was, "Okay… I guess. I was really mad, but now… I'm not so much."

Xander looked around and said, "Where's Oz? He wasn't… I mean he didn't…"

"Oh, no. He's in the van waiting for me. I just wanted to run in and grab a book before I went home, and then I heard…"

They all shared an uncomfortable silence, which Giles broke by saying in an exasperated voice, "You kids should go home, it's getting late."

They both nodded and headed out. Xander was walking stiffly with his arm around Willow's shoulder, and Willow's arm was around his waist.

Giles thought about it and said as they got to the library door, "Willow, I better not catch you at my office door eavesdropping again."

Willow got slightly red, but didn't turn around, or acknowledge that she had heard him, as they continued out the door.

They walked in silence to Oz's van. Oz looked confused and said, "What's wrong?"

Willow said, "Xander fell down some stairs. Could we give him a ride home?"

Oz wasn't sure why Willow had forgiven Xander already, but it was fine with him. Now maybe they could spend the night talking about something else. He said, "Sure."

Willow helped Xander get in the back. She got in the front and thought about all the times she had lied for Xander like that when his dad had socked him one. Xander was apparently a very clumsy guy. She couldn't believe Giles would hit Xander. She hated Xander's dad, and now she was thinking the same thoughts about Giles. Once they got to Xander's house, Willow said, "Oz, I'm really sorry, but would it be okay with you if we skipped tonight. I really need to talk to Xander for a while. I promise I'll make it up to you."

Oz was an easy going, and trusting guy of few words. He said, "Sure." And meant it.

Xander really didn't want to talk, and he said, "That's okay Will. Don't wreck your plans just for me."

Willow pinned him with a look and said, "We do need to talk."

Xander nodded and got painfully out of the van. Oz drove away, and Willow helped Xander into his room. They heard Xander's parents arguing in the kitchen which was good, because it meant they would be ignoring him for the night. When he got to his room, Xander lay on his stomach on his bed and groaned. Willow sat on the edge of the bed next to him and said, "No one has the right to hit you Xander. Not even Giles."

Xander really wanted to just forget about it, but he could tell Willow was getting self-righteous. He thought about it and said, "Giles didn't hit me. Not like Dad. He.. he spanked me."

Willow said, "It's the same thing!"

"No it's not. Trust me I know the difference, even if you don't. You remember the time when we were in first grade, and I spent the night at your house. We got in a fight over what to play. I pulled your hair, and you punched me in the stomach."

Willow smirked and said, "My dad saw, and gave us both a couple of swats."

Xander nodded and said, "It was like that."

"But it sounded so bad. You must be really bruised up."
Xander felt like a complete wuss, because he didn't think he was going to be bruised. He said, "I'm sure it sounded worse than it really was, and even if it was horrible, it was… a relief."

"How can you say that?"

"I felt really, really bad about us Will. I never wanted to hurt you, but I did, and I still feel bad about it, but not as bad. I feel like now I've paid for it in some way, and so maybe I can start to feel better. I'm embarrassed about the… what Giles did, and I wouldn't have told you, but I guess now I'm glad you know, because I can honestly tell you that I did deserve it for what I did to you, even if it was unintentional."

Willow said, "I would have forgiven you… eventually."

Xander smiled and said, "But now we don't have to wait. I would have been more miserable for the next month waiting for you to forgive me, than I will be for the next few days while I still can't sit down. Please don't be mad at Giles. I'm not."

Willow thought about it and said, "You know Xan… You're my best friend, and for the past couple of years before I met Oz… I… I loved you. I mean I pined for you. I… I wanted you to be my boyfriend. And then the other day…. When we were here in the room… and I…and you…" Willow couldn't finish. She broke down and started to cry.

Xander sat up on his very sore butt, and put his arms around Willow. He said, "I know Will. I know, and I'm so sorry."

Xander held her and let her cry while he tried not to squirm too much. He knew he deserved to sit there in pain until she was done. When she had quieted down Xander tried to lighten her mood by saying, "You can hit me too if you want."

Willow smiled and lightly punched his arm as he let her go. She said, "I think Giles did a good enough job."

Xander groaned and rolled back over onto his stomach as he said, "Yes, he did."

Willow said, "You wanna play cards for a while to get your mind off it?"

"I'm really tired, and I kinda want to go to bed."

Willow patted him on the back, and said, "Okay. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Hey, before you go, could you get me a snack and some Tylenol. I really don't want to see my parents tonight."

After Willow brought him his snack and left for home, Xander checked out the damage to his butt in his mirror. He didn't think he would have any bruises except maybe one on his thigh, and one on his sit spot. He ate, took the pills, and turned off his light before lying down on the bed. He was exhausted and had no trouble falling asleep.


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